Father Hawk

The Battle of Sokovia rang in her head, ever fresh and every detail painfully accurate. It tortured her, caused her to lose sleep, gave her nightmares. If she hadn’t protected the core, if she hadn’t chased off Pietro, if she had traded places with him, they both would still be here. It probably wouldn’t have hurt so much if she at least had her home country to visit. But even her only home was gone.

A part of her heart, her soul, her mind, violently ripped away at the hands of the murderous robot, Ultron.

She wish she could’ve done more to hurt him for what he did to her. It was more than just feeling like her heart had been taken from her body. So much more.

Her transition to America and the Avengers was difficult. To allow her to get over culture shock and grieve, she wasn’t forced into training like the others, just told that once a day she needed to go to the weight room and work out for at least an hour to keep healthy.

The others, Steve, Natasha, Rhodey, Sam, and Vision, they hadn’t reached out to her much than occasionally asking how she was doing. There was one person, who had supposedly announced his retirement, that still hung out around the compound for what seemed like solely for the purpose of watching over her: Clint.

He had been her biggest support ever since Sokovia. He seemed to always know where she was when she wasn’t barricading herself in her room and he made it his mission to at least be in the same room as her, even if they never spoke a single word to each other. Just so she knew he was there.

She greatly appreciated it. She didn’t know where she’d be without him. He had turned into a father/brotherly figure.

Tonight she was having an exceptionally bad nightmare. Not only was she witnessing her brother’s death, but it was caused by her own hand; her powers getting out of control and he tried to step in to help her.

The look in his eyes, first surprise, then realization, and then the hurt settled in that his own sister, though involuntary, had mortally wounded him. He gasped out her name as he fell.

With a scream, Wanda awoke, an energy wave shooting out around her and causing all the glass in her room to shatter. Tears streamed freely down her face as she took in a shaky breath, burying her head in her hands. She shook her head, whispering to herself that it wasn’t real, that didn’t happen.

Normally, Pietro would’ve rushed to her side the moment her mouth tore open to scream.

Now Clint took over that role. He didn’t bother knocking as he burst into the room, looking down at the glass before looking around and his eyes resting on Wanda. He went to her side and wordlessly pulled her into a hug.

Wanda wrapped her arms tightly around him, sobbing into his chest. She clung to him, not wanting to let him go. This was the worse she had been yet.

Clint, his heart breaking, ran his hand through her hair, trying to whisper comforting words to him. He had started to study Sokovia so he could also sooth her in her native tongue, especially in situations like this. He had even made himself memorize a couple lullabies he had heard her sing to herself to calm herself down. He started to sing softly one of these, slowly rocking her in his arms.

Eventually, Wanda began to calm down but she still didn’t let him go.

“Do you want to talk about your nightmare?” Clint asked, his voice soft, gentle, nurturing.

“I couldn’t control my powers,” Wanda replied, her body numb and her voice empty. “I ended up killing my own brother.”

“Wanda,” he whispered. He pulled away just enough so he could cup her face and gently raise it so he could look into her eyes. He was startled by how lost and empty they looked. She never showed it around the others but this must’ve been something she’s been fighting the past month. “That isn’t what happened. Your brother died a hero.”

“I’m still without him.” Her voice shook as more tears spring into her eyes. “Clint, I miss him so much. Why does it hurt? My heart is constantly aching. I’ve only known life with my brother but even now he’s gone.”

“I won’t lie to you. It’s going to hurt. You’re never going to be the same. You’re going to ache and there will be times that you miss him and you’re too overrun by grief to function from day-to-day. Some days where you’re like this. And that’s alright. It’s natural. But do you wanna know the best way to honor his memory? To make him smile so that when it’s finally time for you to see him, he’ll run up to you and hug you and tell you how proud he is of you?” He paused as he grabbed her arms and squeezed them gently. “The days when you are fine, when you can take on the world, when you fight back against life, you do everything possible to live life to the fullest and fight in his honor. You have us with you. If you ever need a break from avenging, you can come to the Farm with me and my family. You’re welcome there anytime.”

She nodded slowly and took a deep breath. “Will you stay with me tonight, Clint? I don’t want to be alone.”

Clint nodded this time. “Of course. How about we go to my room and in the morning I’ll take care of all this glass."

The two of them walked to Clint’s room and in her new brother’s (but definitely not a total replacement for Pietro) arms, Wanda fell asleep.

XXX

The next morning was the first time she joined the team in training.

She was ready to be an Avenger.